LATEST EPISODE: Episode "Female Comedy: Long Time"

(lights up)



Louise

Hello.



I realize that it's been a long time. We had some long, hot tortured nights between the two of us. We had a terrible love: A Bad Romance. But to be quite honest, it's in the middle of July, we're both at this extremely sexy Latin dance club and you aren't making me crazy. In fact, I feel like a Latin Sex pot. Like the Columbian singer, Shakira? Seriously, my hips don't lie. You need to touch me. I have to tell you something.

I'm wearing black eyeliner. I NEVER wear black liquid eyeliner;. Girls will tell you it's something they do "just for fun". This is a lie. It takes an entire damaging relationship cycle to take this shit OFF. Forget about putting it on "just for fun". I'm not here just to have "fun" with my girl friends. Well, okay, that is a lie. I am telling people that on my Facebook account right now. Or do the kids call it Twiiter? It's supposed to be this online dating network; I guess in college you were supposed to know about it.

What I'm trying to say is, I think I can dance, even though I'm holding an Long Island Iced Tea, and my hips are not lying, and you need to do me like I'm Shakira right now.